Lily Allen recently opened up about her past relationships on the “Miss Me?” podcast that she co-hosts with Miquita Oliver. During a discussion, she shared that her behavior during her first relationship raised some important warning signs. She described how her intimacy changed significantly when she started dating her first boyfriend, Lester.
Allen mentioned that she was a very affectionate child, but once she began her romantic relationship, she found herself withdrawing from her family. “As soon as I got my first boyfriend, I didn’t want to be touched, hugged, or kissed by anyone in my family anymore,” she explained. Instead, all her emotional needs were focused on this one person, which she recognized as a troubling pattern of codependency. “It was a major red flag for me,” she added.
The singer, who recently went through a breakup with her husband, David Harbour, acknowledged that this behavior wasn’t healthy. She realized that she was putting all her emotional energy into just one person, which is something she now sees as problematic.
Miquita Oliver contributed to the conversation by suggesting that Allen’s reaction could have stemmed from finally feeling safe with a male figure in her life. Allen agreed, considering it possible but not completely certain.
Earlier in the episode, they discussed how physical intimacy with their children differs depending on their comfort levels. Allen talked about her two daughters, Ethel, who is 13, and Marnie, who is 12. She explained that one of her daughters prefers kisses on the forehead, while the other enjoys kisses on the lips. “Whatever they want is fine with me; I respect their comfort,” Allen said.
Lily Allen’s recent reflection on her past relationship habits comes after her split from Harbour. They had been married since 2020, and sources have reported that their marriage faced significant challenges, leading to their separation. Allen also admitted that she wasn’t in a good place emotionally leading up to their breakup, having discussed her struggles on the podcast just before the news of their split became public.
In January, she shared how she had been feeling overwhelmed and spiraling with emotional issues. Rumors started circulating about the state of her marriage towards the end of 2024, especially after reports suggested that she had created a profile on a celebrity dating app.
Looking to cope with her emotions, Allen revealed that she later checked into a treatment center seeking help for her struggles. Meanwhile, Harbour seems to be moving on from the marriage and has been linked to a younger model, Ellie Fallon.
Overall, Allen’s reflections on her past and her current situation underline the importance of maintaining healthy emotional boundaries and the significance of addressing one’s mental health.