10 Quick Tips For Uncovering Your Partner's Secrets: Revealing Their True Identity And Other Clever Strategies

Last week during our girls’ dinner, one of my friends burst in, excited to share a story she had been waiting to tell. Just as she ordered a martini, we all leaned in, ready to hear more. After months of wondering, she had found out that her husband was using OnlyFans. Fortunately, she hadn’t caught him in the act, but her method of discovering the truth was clever. As a dating columnist, I feel it’s important to share this surprisingly simple trick that took just ten seconds to execute.

What did my friend do? She went to the OnlyFans login page, entered her husband’s email, and waited. If the email was not associated with an account, she’d be able to sign up. But if it was registered? A message would inform her. After hitting enter, an alarming notification appeared on her screen: “This email is already registered.” Her trust shattered in an instant. Naturally, she began to wonder who he was subscribing to—was it someone young and familiar like “LolaKitten69”? Was it just harmless browsing, or was there something more serious going on?

While I processed her shocking revelation, I heard about another smart way of uncovering secrets in relationships. On a podcast I enjoy, a comedian recounted how a friend suspected her partner was sneaking off to see his ex. Her solution? She discreetly left one of her AirPods in his car. Thanks to the Find My app, she could track it and see where he went. Surprise! She discovered he was parking outside his ex’s house. It worked, although I wouldn’t recommend hiding AirPods in your partner’s car—they can be costly!

It’s clear that when something feels wrong in a relationship, there might be a valid reason. If your intuition tells you something isn’t right, or if you just want to satisfy your curiosity without judgment, there are clever ways to seek answers. Here are a few sneaky techniques that could be surprisingly effective:

Archive Check on WhatsApp: Many people hide conversations in the Archive folder. Just above regular chats, you’ll see “archived.” Click it and find any suspicious conversations that could indicate betrayal.
Dating App Investigation: Similar to the OnlyFans trick, you can check subscription-based platforms like Tinder. Enter their email or phone number to see if they have an account. If you see a message saying the email is already registered, your concerns might be on point.
Forgot Password Trick: For dating apps, entering your partner’s email and selecting the "forgot password" option could reveal if they have an account. If they do, they’ll notice an email notification, so be discreet!
AirDrop Names: Check their AirDrop name in public. It might reveal a nickname they use elsewhere, possibly tying them to someone unexpected.
Bluetooth Names: If you’re in their car, check the Bluetooth device list. Seeing unfamiliar names can be a red flag.
Saved Passwords: Look in their browser for saved passwords to dating apps or suspicious sites. It can be an eye-opener.
Location Tracking: If you’ve shared location via Find My iPhone, you might discover questionable visits to unknown addresses.
Instagram Search: Search through their Instagram followers for keywords related to infidelity or any particular accounts you’re concerned about.
Snapchat Score: If their Snapchat score is climbing while they claim not to use the app, they might be active behind the scenes with someone else.
PayID Name Check: If you’re just getting to know someone, using their phone number with PayID can verify their real name, helping to uncover possible deception.

While it’s understandable to conduct some personal sleuthing when your gut instincts are on high alert, remember that if you’re in a situation where you feel the need to investigate, it might indicate deeper issues in your relationship. Even if you find nothing alarming, asking these questions could lead to a more honest conversation. However, be cautious about searching for information—because once you find out something, you can’t unlearn it.